In the past few months, a lovely woman has been coming to the deli and buying just one thing. The woman’s voice is exactly like the mother character on that 90′s sitcom The Nanny. So hear that in your head when you read this.
The first time I saw her, she said she really wanted some cole slaw, but it was “too juicy” so she made me take two spoons and “squeeze the juice out” for her.
Again on her next visit she complained it was too juicy and made me waste time “squeezing the juice out.”
The third time, she told me – “Get all the juice out. I take it home and I wash it.” I gave her a blank look, then smiled absently.
The fourth time, she asked me – “Oh, you couldn’t wash it for me, could you?” WHAT? Yea, I’ll get right on that as soon as i finish my laundry. What the hell do you expect me to do, stick some cole slaw in a bowl and run it under water, then strain the water with my imaginary strainer and place the soggy mess into a cup? Get the hell out of here. Who the fuck washes their cole slaw? Buy a goddamn bag of shredded cabbage and just make your own you fucking weirdo.
Now every time she stops by she always asks other stupid questions but I try to not help her so I don’t have to feel my brain cells dying each time she tells me she washes her cole slaw. She says it EVERY TIME SHE ORDERS COLE SLAW. Is it supposed to be a hint to us? That we should make it differently so she doesnt have to wash it? Well tough, we don’t make it. It comes in a bucket and we put it in a bowl. Fucking weirdo.
Regresty.com posted a youtube video and link to this girl’s website. I watched the two minute video and felt the urge to have an abortion.
The girl is only ten years old, yet is a “fashion designer.” She talks like a snobby 80′s valley girl- complete with overusage of the word “like” and wet noises between her words. Id like to know who taught her English. Also, the girl complains she hated her sewing teacher, basically because the woman was trying to TEACH. This spoiled little girl has already learned to get her own way, ignore and disrespect her elders, and disregard anyone’s opinion but her own. She is selfish and stuck up. I would hate to see her as an adult, and can only imagine all the discomfort and pain that must come from her acquaintance.
Also, her designs are hideous. They are dresses for children, costing more than $60. They are sewn crookedly, have no sleeves (presumably because she quit her sewing class and never learned how to make sleeves), ugly in fabric choice, and just plain ridiculous.
I’m all for encouraging your children to reach for the stars and be your best, etc cliche, etc cliche. But there is a big bold line that was crossed when parenting this child. She wasn’t taught anything at all except that she can get her own way and people will fall on their knees to please her.
I don’t want to post her site. You can either go to regretsy or google her based on 10yr old fashion designer.
There is a regular customer who likes to talk about her family. I overheard her telling my coworker that her daughter just had another baby. Ahem. Here are the names of her three children:
Olympus
Spartacus
Apocalypse
Those children are going to get beat up in school. Traumatized. Just my opinion. I mean really…. Apocalypse?
I was cranky one day at work. When Sean came in and tried talking to me I just shrugged, pointed, waved, nodded. He apparently has had a very poor education, as this is what he said.
“What are you, a mine? You’re not talking just hand movements? You’re a mine?”
A SRT IV
Papawolf
ICHU8ME
I AM ELI
Myvineyard
Imagin 1
LEARN
Outzway
Phattatz
Sxydama
Allflava
There is this woman who doesn’t speak english and comes to the deli counter. She waits on line, and when its her turn, she points to the rotisserie oven and says “chicken.”
At first, I didn’t know she didn’t understand ANY english. So I’d try and explain, the cooked chickens were in the front of the store. The ones in the oven were just put there, and they are RAW. I cannot give you a raw chicken.
She would then say “no, fresh.”
Id then say…. those are NOT COOKED. COOKED. Ones are in the front of the store.
Then she would point to the oven.
No.
And she’d keep pointing.
The first time this happened another customer was there and repeated what I said. Then she just said okay and walked away.
The second time she did this I just kept saying, “no, not cooked.”
And shed stand there waiting till she got bored.
The third time I just said no and ignored her.
Someone needs to teach me how to explain this to her in Spanish.
I was waiting for an elevator when two young black guys and one spanish guy walked into the lobby. They were very loud and obnoxious, talking about weed and other things.
They were just there.
We all got on the elevator and I hit my floor. No one else pressed a button so it would be assumed they were going to the same floor.
As we passed the second floor, the loudest of the three said “no no, 2. 2.” Then he kept pressing two saying they could still make it. The elevator kept moving. He started to yell at his friends because no one had pressed their floor. I glanced at him, because he was causing such a racket, and he said to me,
“I’m sorry. I’m black.”
Then he went on about not getting his floor so I said sarcastically, “I’m sorry, its my fault, I should have asked what floor you were going to.”
And he said “nah, nah. I’m with two idiots who both knew we were getting off at the second floor and no one pressed it.”
So I said again I’m so sorry.
He then went on about being black and how black people are loud and he kept saying “I’m sorry, I’m black.”
There happened to be a black girl on the elevator, and hearing him, she gave him the dirtiest look. I was laughing too hard.
Sean and his friend spend about twenty minutes arguing over whose facebook pictures were “harder.”
They then proceeded to take pictures of each other at work to send to some girl, and to put up on facebook.
I wish they’d just work harder instead of trying to “look hard.”
I really hate those people who come to return bottles and cans. The way they ignore their children disturbs me. Right now, they have a baby carriage filled with empty bottles and cans and dirty garbage bags. Their little children picked up dirty string from the garbage and are playing with it.
Once, I saw one of their kids pick up gum from the ground and try to eat it. I said something to them, and they didn’t even care. Sometimes the kids play with broken things they can cut themselves on. I mean, I really don’t think these people are poor – I’ve seen the nice car they drive, and the nice clothes they wear. I wish they would just watch their children better, or at least care.
I hate kids, but I wouldn’t want them playing in garbage.
Just heard a black woman say to her friend:
“I’m telling you, the best thing is to be black, get yourself pregnant. You get all kinds of stuff.”
